Thoughts in a Letter I Will Never Send
by MacPazzile
Summary: Gaara's suicide note. Sucky summary, better story.


AN: New story. Yep. I'm still not any good at these another's notes so….. Well, these aren't my actual thoughts. I mean I did come up with this, but, you know, I love life and all so no suicide for me.

Yeah. Anyway, do have this under the proper category? I'm not quite sure.

That's all.

Also, I don't own any of the characters in this story. None of them are mine.

Suicide.

What is it? Well, by definition, is the act of a human being ending his or her own life. But if you were to ask someone what they thought it was, what would they say?

Some might a one-way ticket to hell, others a sick and twisted birthday present to your ex. Another, probable answer, a way to take charge of your life and do what you want with it.

I don't know, and honestly I don't care. I only said because I have no idea what to write. That and I was trying to be witty. Who ever said I was witty was either on something or was trying to make a joke. A bad joke, at that.

How are these things suppose to go, anyway? I know you have to write a long, heart felt note saying how life sucks and how you're loved missed-treated you or how sorry you are about leaving them behind. Then you write 'good bye! You were the best'. Or something along those lines.

But what if you have virtually no one you care for and love? And you just want life to end? Like, it's gone on long enough and you want it just to stop?

How do these notes go then?

Again, I don't know. Maybe I should just 'Good bye, everyone! I shall miss thee!'

Well, that won't work. It's too board. I would be including the people I hate and saying I would miss them, when I really wouldn't. And if this is last thing people read about I want it to be honest and truthful. Not full of lies.

Though, now, I don't know how to say good bye.

OH! I'll make a list!

Temari: I don't know what say to you. Sure, our first few years were a bit rocky, but after awhile you became the big sister I needed. I actually feel bad about leaving you behind. Sorry.

Kankuro: Just re-read what I wrote to Temari. And replace 'sister' with 'brother'. I shall miss your crony, very unfunny jokes, by the way.

Naruto: You were my first real friend. Ever. You helped me learn to feel and were just a good friend. Actually, you were more like a brother than a friend. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, thank you. You made the last few years of my life so wonderful. I will miss you.

Akatsuki: You all are inappropriate words and names.

That was a short list.

Well, I said my goodbyes and now its time to explain why I'm doing this. I feel like my life as gone on for too long. It's a horrible reason, I know, but it's the truth. The horrible, sad truth.

And just in case someone finds this note, I didn't/won't go though with it. I am too scared. I have already died once and am in no hurry to go back to that place. I am aware this note makes it seem like I have or will, but I won't. I just won't. It's just putting these thoughts on paper and pretending make it easier to handle. That's really the only reason I wrote this.

So stop worrying your pretty little head about it.

I am also aware that there is a lot of feeling and out of character sayings in this letter. This is how I feel. And feelings should not be held back and restrained. No matter what they are.

Unless, you're feelings are telling to prey after little children and you are grown, then please, restrain your feelings. Please.

For the lack of anything better to say, I'm ending this here. I have no idea how to.

How about this: these are my thoughts and feelings. They are mine and mine alone. You might not like them or agree, but that doesn't matter. What does matter is that you understand that they will not change or bend for you. Take them as they are, or leave them alone.

Now, too say good-bye. How do I do that?

Writing 'Good-bye' or 'Farewell' is a little, how I don't, over used and it would feel too real, if that makes any sense.

'Talk to you later' is way too casual and is out of place. (The Good-Bye list I made isn't exactly fitting, either.).

And 'Write me back' is just weird.

I got it!

Sincerely,

Gaara Sabaku


End file.
